Date: 240110.
Mood: Confused & sleepy.
Heyzx. Just finished dota-ing. Immersing myself in dota, just to end all the pain. Why can't I just do the right thing? And end up doing something wrong & causing all the people beside me to get hurt?
LISTEN, RAYSON.
LISTEN, RAYSON.
LISTEN, RAYSON.
LISTEN, RAYSON.
LISTEN, RAYSON.
LISTEN, RAYSON.
Control yourself. You don't want to get expelled for whacking a teacher or having open defiance involving any teacher. I've tried, so why can't I f.ing control and strive on till the very end? Sigh, I seriously don't know what to do. Only thing, is to appear happy in front of friends, just not to let them worry. But keeping them all to myself is not going to be good for me. I do want to go to somewhere discrete and remote, and shout out all your feelings just to make myself feel better. But where am I going to find that special place? Things aren't what I thought it was to be. People do change, and I must admit, I'm not different. Ever since you said _____ to me, my feelings changed rapidly. I was totally heartbroken, but I gave you time, and chances to cool down and forgive me. Instead, you pierced my heart, making the wounds impossible to heal. I know time heals wounds, but how fast will it heal? It's just like making yourself numb to everything, everyone. Ignore EVERYTHING. My feelings have faded. I'm no longer myself. I.. I have nothing else to say. It's all beyond my limits.
